The Wise and Ingenious Companion, French and English; or, A Collection of the Wit of the Illustrious Persons, Both Ancient and Modern — Reading Notes

e _Theopompus_ ètoit Roy de _Sparte_, quelqu’un dit en sa presence, que leurs Ville ètoit florissante, parce que leurs Rois avoient appris à gouverner, à quoi le Roy repondit fort sagement, _Que cela venoit plûtôt de ce que le Peuple avoit appris à obeïr_; donnant à entendre que les Villes où la Populace a du credit, se font beaucoup de tort par leurs Factions & leur desobeïssance, & qu’alors il est difficile, même aux meilleurs Magistrats de les bien gouverner.

_Dionysius_ the elder, Tyrant of _Syracuse_, reproving his Son, for that he had forcibly violated the Chastity of one of the Citizens Wives, asked him amongst other Things, if he had ever heard that any such thing had been done by him; _No_, said the Son, _but that was because you was not Son to a King_: _Neither_, said _Dionysius_, _will you ever be a Father to one, unless you give over such Pranks as these._ The event proved the truth of what he said; for when this young Man succeeded his Father, he was expelled the Kingdom of _Syracuse_ for his ill Behaviour and manner of Life.

_Denys_ le vieux, Tyran de _Syracuse_, grondant son Fils de ce qu’il avoit violé la Chasteté de la Femme d’un des Bourgeois, lui demanda entr’autres choses, s’il avoit jamais entendu dire, qu’il eut fait de pareilles Actions; _Non_, lui dit le Fils, _mais c’est parce que vous n’ètiez pas Fils de Roy_: _Tu n’en seras jamais Pere_, lui dit _Denys_, _si tu fais plus de ces Folies._ L’evenement justifia la verité de ce qu’il disoit; car ce jeune Homme ayant succedé à son Pere, il fut chassé du Royaume de _Syracuse_ à cause de sa méchante Conduite & de sa mauvaise Vie.

King _Antigonus_ came to visit _Antagoras_ a learned Man, whom he found in his Tent busied in the Cooking of Congers, _Do you think_, said _Antigonus_, _that_ Homer _at such time as he wrote the glorious Actions of_ Agamemnon _was boiling of Congers?_ _And do you think_, said the other, _that_ Agamemnon _when he did those great Actions, was wont to concern himself whether any Man in his Camp boiled Congers or not_,

Le Roy _Antigonus_ alla voir _Antagoras_, Homme savant, lequel il trouva dans sa Tente occupé à apprêter des Congres; _Croyez vous_, lui dit _Antigonus_, _qu’_Homere _fit bouillir des Congres lors qu’il écrivoit les glorieuses Actions d’_Agamemnon_?_ _Et pensez vous_, lui dit l’autre, _que lors qu’_Agamemnon _faisoit ces belles Actions, il se mît en peine si quelqu’un dans son Camp faisoit bouillir des Congres ou non?_

_Socrates_ was asked, why he endured his Wifes Brawling; says he, Why do you suffer your Geese to gaggle? _because_, answered one, _they lay us Eggs_; _and my Wife brings me Children_, said he.

On demanda à _Socrate_ pourquoy il enduroit les Criailleries de sa Femme, & vous, dit il, Pourquoy souffrez vous le bruit de vos Oyes? _Parce_, repondit quelqu’un, _qu’elles nous pondent des Oeufs_; _& bien_, dit il, _& ma Femme me fait des Enfans_.

_Apelles_ the famous Painter, drew the Picture of _Alexander_ the Great on Horse-back, and presented it to him; but _Alexander_ not praising it as so excellent a Piece deserved, _Apelles_ desired a living Horse might be brought, who seeing the Picture, fell to pawing and neighing, taking it to be a real one; whereupon _Apelles_ told him, _his Horse understood Painting better than himself_.

_Apelles_ le fameux Peintre, fit le Portrait d’_Alexandre_ le Grand à Cheval, & le lui presenta, mais comme _Alexandre_ ne loüoit pas assez un si excellent Ouvrage, _Apelles_ demanda qu’on fit venir un Cheval en Vie, lequel à la veuë du portrait se mit à trepigner des Pieds, & à hennir, le prenant pour une realité; surquoy _Apelles_, lui dit, _que son Cheval s’entendoit mieux en Peinture que lui_.

_Virgil_, the famous Poet, was much in favour thro’ his great Wit and Learning with _Augustus_, insomuch that he daily received his Bread from him; _Augustus_ one Day knowing his deep Discretion, ask’d him privately, _If he could guess what was his Father_; to which he replied, _Truly Sir, I do verily believe he was a Baker_, _a Baker, and why so?_ says _Augustus_; _because_ says _Virgil_, _you always reward me with Bread_, which Answer so well pleased the Emperour, that he rewarded him afterwards with Money.

Le fameux Poëte _Virgile_ s’ètoit si bien acquis les bonnes Graces d’_Auguste_ par son Savoir & par son Esprit, qu’il en recevoit son Pain ordinaire; _Auguste_ connoissant la profondeur de son jugement, lui demanda un jour en particulier, _s’il pouvoit deviner ce qu’ètoit son Pere_? _Seigneur, lui repliqua-t-il, je crois fermement qu’il ètoit Boulenger_; _Boulenger, & pourquoy cela_, lui dit _Auguste_; _parce_, dit _Virgile_, _que vous me recompensez toûjours en Pain_. Cette Réponse plût si fort à l’Empereur, que dans la suite il le recompensa en Argent,

_Alexander_ the Great, having defeated the Army of _Darius_ King of _Persia_, _Darius_ sued to him for Peace, and proffered him one half of _Asia_, with ten thousand Talents. _Parmenio_, one of his Favourites, charm’d with so advantageous a Proposal, _Sir_, said he to his Master, _I vow were I_ Alexander, _I would gladly accept these offers_; _and so would I_, answered _Alexander_, _if I was_ Parmenio.

_Alexandre_ le Grand ayant remporté la Victoire sur l’Armée de _Darius_ Roy de _Perse_, celui-ci lui demanda la Paix, & lui offrit la moitié de l’_Asie_, avec dix mille Talents. _Parmenion_, un de ses Favoris, charmé d’une Proposition si avantageuse, _Seigneur_, dit-il à son Maître, _je vous proteste que si j’ètois_ Alexandre, _j’accepterois ces offres avec joye_; _& moy aussi_, lui répondit _Alexandre_, _si j’ètois_ Parmenion.

The same _Alexander_ being at _Delphos_, dragged the Priestess of _Apollo_ to the Temple, in order to make her consult the Oracle upon a forbidden Day: She having resisted him in vain, cried out, _Alexander thou art invincible_. _I desire no other Oracle but this_, reply’d he.

Le même _Alexandre_, ètant à _Delphes_, entraina la Pretresse d’_Apollon_ dans le Temple, pour lui faire consulter l’Oracle en un jour deffendu; Elle, s’écria, aprés lui avoir resisté en vain, _Alexandre, tu ès invincible_. _Je ne veux point_, dit-il, _d’autre Oracle que celui-là._

_Leo_ the _Bizantine_, a Disciple of _Plato_, and a very famous Philosopher, going to meet _Philip_ King of _Macedon_, who came with a great Army against his Country, told him, _Sir, why do you come to attack our City_; _because_, said _Philip_, _I am in Love with her, and am come to enjoy her_. _Ah! Sir_, reply’d _Leo_, _Lovers don’t come to their Mistresses with Instruments of War, but of Musick._ This agreeable and witty Repartee so pleased _Philip_ that he changed his Resolution, and leaving _Byzantium_ at liberty, passed on to other Conquests.

_Leon_ le _Bizantin_, Auditeur de _Platon_, & Philosophe fort fameux, ètant allé au devant de _Philippe_ Roy de _Macedoine_ qui venoit avec une grosse Armée attaquer sa Patrie, il lui dit, _Seigneur, Pourquoy venez vous attaquer nôtre Ville?_ _parce que j’en suis amoureux_, dit _Philippe_, en raillant, _& que je viens pour en jouir_. _Ah! Sire_, reprit _Leon_, _les Amans ne vont point chez leurs Maîtresses avec des instrumens de Guerre, mais avec des instrumens de Musique_. Cette agréable & subtile réponse plût si sort à _Philippe_ qu’il changea de resolution, & laissant _Bizance_ en liberté, il passa à d’autres Conquetes.

One asked _Pythagoras_ why he had married his Daughter to one of his Enemies; _because_, answered that Philosopher, _I thought I could do him no greater injury than give him a Wife_.

On demandoit a _Pythagore_, pourquoy il avoit marié sa Fille à un de ses Ennemis, ce Philosophe répondit, que c’estoit, _parce qu’il croyait ne pouvoir lui faire un plus grand mal que de lui donner une Femme_.

_Diogenes_ seeing an ill Marks-man drawing his Bow, he put himself just before the Mark, and being asked why he did so, _because_, said he, _he’ll be sure not hit me there_.

_Diogene_ voyant un Homme que tiroit de l’Arc, & qui en tiroit fort mal, se mit devant le but, on luy demanda, pourquoy il s’en mettoit si prés, _c’est_, répondit-il, _afin qu’il ne me touche point_.

_Alexander_ going to see _Diogenes_ the _Cynick_, He found him in a Field basking himself in the Sun; and accosting him, followed by all his Court, he said to him, I am _Alexander_ the Great: And I, answered the Philosopher, am _Diogenes_ the Cynick. _Alexander_ made him several offers, and asked him what he desired of him; nothing, said _Diogenes_, but only that you stand a little aside, and don’t hinder the Sun to shine upon me. The King surprized with his Manners, cried out _were I not_ Alexander, _I could be_ Diogenes.

_Alexandre_ allant voir _Diogene_ le Cynique, il le trouva dans un champ expozé au Soleil, & l’abordant suivi de toute sa Cour, il luy dit, je suis le grand _Alexandre_; & moy, répondit le Philosophe, je suis _Diogene_ le Cynique: _Alexandre_ luy fit plusieurs offres, & luy demanda ce qu’il souhaitoit de lui? rien autre chose dit _Diogene_, _si-non que tu te mettes un peu à côté, parce que tu empêches le Soleil de donner sur moy_. Le Roy surpris de ces Manieres, s’êcria, _si je n’ètois point Alexandre je voudrois être_ Diogene.

_Pompey_ being Sick of a Feaver, one of his Friends came to see him, and as he came into his Room, he spied a handsom Woman Slave, whom _Pompey_ loved, going out, he asked _Pompey_ how it was with him, _the Feaver_, said _Pompey_, _left me but just now_: _Very like_, reply’d his Friend, _for I met her a going from you_.

_Pompée_ ètant Malade de la Fievre, un de ses Amis le vint voir, & vit en entrant dans sa chambre une belle Escalve, dont _Pompée_ ètoit amoureux, qui en sortoit: il demanda à _Pompée_ comment il se portoit, _la Fievre vient de me quitter_, lui dit _Pompée_, _je l’ai rencontrée qui sortoit de chez vous_, lui dit son Ami.

The Emperour _Augustus_ endeavouring to find the reason of the great likeness which a young _Grecian_ bore to him, asked him whether his Mother was ever at _Rome_: _No, Sir_, answered the _Grecian_, _but my Father has many a time_.

L’Empereur _Auguste_ cherchant des Raisons de la grande ressemblance qui ètoit entre lui & un jeune Homme _Grec_, lui demanda si sa Mere avoit jamais êté à _Rome_? _Non, Seigneur_, lui répondit le _Grec_, _mais mon Pere y est venu plusieurs fois_.

_Pisistrates_, a Tyrant of _Athens_, having resolved to marry a second Wife, his Children asked him whether he did it out of any discontent he had received from them. _On the contrary_, answered he, _I am so well pleased with you, and find you to be such fine Men, that I have a mind to have other Children like you_.

_Pisistrate_, Tyran d’_Athenes_, ayant resolu de se remarier, ses Enfans lui demanderent si c’ètoit à cause de quelque mécontentement qu’il eût receu d’eux. _au contraire_, leur répondit-il, _je suis si content de vous, & je vous trouve si honnêtes Gens, que je veux avoir encore d’autres Enfans qui vous ressemblent_.

_Thales_ the _Milesian_, one of the Seven Wise-men of _Greece_, being asked what was the _oldest Thing_? He answered, _God_, because he has been for ever; what was _the handsomest Thing_? he said, _the World_; because it is the Work of God; what _the largest Thing_? _Place_; because it comprehends every thing besides; what the _most convenient_? _Hope_; because when all other Things are lost that remains still; what the _best Thing_? _Virtue_; for without it nothing that is Good can be said or done; what the _quickest_? a _Mans Thoughts_; because in one Moment they run over all the Universe; what the _strongest_? _Necessity_; because it surmounts all other Accidents; what the _easiest_? to give _Councel_; what the _hardest_? to know ones self; what the _wisest Thing_? _Time_; because it brings all Things to pass.

_Thales Milesien_, l’un des sept Sages de _Grece_, étant interrogé quelle étoit la chose _la plus ancienne_? répondit que c’étoit _Dieu_; parce qu’il a toûjours été; quelle étoit la chose _la plus belle_? il dit que c’étoit _le Monde_; parce que c’est l’ouvrage de Dieu? quelle étoit la chose _la plus grande_? _le lieu_; parce qu’il comprend toute autre chose; quelle chose étoit la _plus Commode_? _l’Esperance_; parce qu’aprés avoir perdu tous les autres biens, elle reste toûjours; quelle chose ètoit _la Meilleure_? _la vertu_; parce que sans elle, on ne peut rien dire, n’y rien faire de bon; quelle chose ètoit _la plus promte_? _l’esprit de l’homme_; parce qu’en un moment il parcourt tout l’Univers; quelle chose ètoit _la plus forte_? la _Necessité_; parce qu’elle surmonte tous les autres Accidens; quelle chose ètoit la _plus facile_? _de donner conseil_; quelle chose ètoit la plus difficile? _de se connoître soy même_; quelle chose ètoit la _plus Sage_? _le temps_, répondit-il, parce qu’il vient à bout de tout.

A certain Soldier came in a great Fright to _Leonidas_ and told him, Captain, the Enemy are very near us; then we are very near them too, said _Leonidas_. There was another that came to tell him that the Enemy were so numerous that one could hardly see the Sun for the quantity of their Arrows; to whom he answered very pleasantly, _will it not be a great Pleasure to fight in the shade?_

Vn certain Soldat fort épouvanté, se presenta devant _Leonidas_, & luy dit, mon Capitaine les Ennemis sont fort prez de nous; & bien, nous sommes donc aussi fort prés d’eux, répondit _Leonidas_. Il y en eut un autre qui luy rapporta que le nombre des Ennemis ètoit si grand, qu’à grand peine pouvoit on voir le Soleil par la quantité de leurs dards; il luy répondit fort agréablement, _ne sera-ce pas un grand plaisir de combatre à l’ombre?_

_Alexander_ the Great asked _Dionides_, a famous Pirate, who was brought Prisoner to him, why he was so bold as to rob and plunder in his Seas, he answered, that he did it for his Profit, and as _Alexander_ himself was used to do; _but because I do it_, added he, _with one single Gally, I am called a Pirate: But you Sir, Who do it with a great Army are called a King._ That bold Answer so pleased _Alexander_ that he gave him his Liberty, at that very instant.

_Alexandre_ le grand demandoit â _Dionides_ fameux Corsaire qui luy avoit été amené prisonnier, pour quelle raison il avoir été si hardy que de pirater & de faire des courses sur ses Mers; il répondit, que c’ètoit pour son profit, & comme _Alexandre_ avoit coûtume de faire lui même, _mais parce que je le fais_, ajouta-til, _avec une seule Galere, l’on m’appelle Corsaire; mais vous, Seigneur, qui le faites avec une grande Armée, l’on vous appelle Roy_. Cette réponse hardie plût tant à _Alexandre_, qu’il lui donna aussi tôt la liberté.

_Darius_ King of _Persia_ sent great Presents to _Epaminondas_, General of the _Thebans_, with design to tamper with him: If _Darius_, said this great Captain to those that brought those Presents to him, _has a mind to be Friends with the_ Thebans, _he need not buy my Friendship; and if he has other Thoughts, he has not Riches enough to corrupt me_; and so he sent them back.

_Darius_ Roy de _Perse_, envoya de grands Presents à _Epaminondas_, Chef des _Thebains_, pour tâcher de le corrompre: _Si_ Darius _veut être Ami des_ Thebains, dit ce grand Capitaine à ceux qui les lui portoient, _il n’est pas nécessaire qu’il achete mon amitié; & s’il a d’autres sentiments, il n’est pas assez riche pour me corrompre_. _Et ainsi il les renvoya._

_Corax_ promised _Tisias_ to teach him Rhetorick, and _Tisias_ on his side engaged to give him a Reward for it; but when he had learnt it, he refused to satisfy him: _Corax_ therefore called him before the Judge; _Tisias_ trusting to the subtilty of his Rhetorick, asked him _what Rhetorick consisted in_: _Corax_ answered _in the Art of Perswading_. Then said _Tisias_, _If I can perswade the Judge that I ought to give you nothing, I’ll pay you nothing, because you will be cast; and if I do not perswade them, I shan’t pay you neither; because I have not learnt how to perswade; therefore your best way is to relinquish your enterprize_. But _Corax_, who was more subtle than he, resumed the Argument in this Manner, _if you perswade the Judges you ought to pay me; because you have learnt Rhetorick; if you do not perswade them, you must pay me likewise, because you will be cast; so let it be how it will you ought to satisfy me_.

_Corax_ promit à _Tisias_ de luy enseigner la Rhétorique, & _Tisias_ de son côté s’engagea de lui en payer le Salaire; mais l’ayant apprise, il ne vouloit point le satisfaire, c’est pourquoy _Corax_ l’appella en justice. _Tisias_ se fiant sur la subtilité de sa Rhétorique lui demanda, _en quoy consistoit la Rhétorique_: Corax repondit, _qu’elle consistoit dans l’art de persuader_. donc dit _Tisias_, _si je persuade les juges, que je ne te dois rien donner, je ne te payeray aucune chose, parce que je gagneray le procez; & si je ne les persuade pas, je ne te payeray pas non plus, parce que je n’auray pas appris à persuader; ainsi tu feras mieux d’abandonner l’entreprise_. Mais _Corax_ qui ètoit plus fin que luy, reprit l’argument de cette maniere; _si tu persuades les juges, tu me dois payer, parce que tu auras appris la Rhétorique, si tu ne les persuader pas, tu me dois payer de même; parce que tu perdras ton procez, ainsi de quelle façon que ce soit tu dois me satisfaire_.

_Mecenas_, _Augustus_’s Favourite, being entertained at Dinner by a Roman Knight, towards the end of the Meal, began to take some Liberties with his Wife; the Knight, to make his court to him, instead of shewing any jealousy of it, counterfeited Sleep; but seeing one of his Slaves going to take away something from the Cup board, _Sirrah_, says he, _doest thou not see that I only sleep for_ Mecenas?

Mécéne Favori d’_Auguste_, étant regalé par un Chevalier Romain, sur la fin du repas il commença à prendre quelque libertez avec sa Femme. le Chevalier pour lui faire sa Cour, au lieu d’en paroitre jaloux, fit semblant de dormir; mais voyant qu’un de ses Esclaves alloit emporter quelque chose du Buffet, _Coquin_, lui dit-il, _ne vois tu pas que je ne dors que pour_ Mécéne?

There was at _Rome_, in the Time of the Emperour _Augustus_, a poor _Greek_ Poet who from time to time, when the Emperour went out of his Palace, presented him with a Greek Epigram; and though the Emperour took it, yet he never gave him any thing; on the contrary, having a mind one Day to ridicule him and shake him off, assoon as he saw him coming to present him with his Verses, the Emperour sent him a _Greek_ Epigram of his own Composing, and writ with his own Hand. The Poet received it with joy, and as he was reading of it, he shewed by his Face and Gestures that he was mightily pleased with it. After he had read it, he pulled out his Purse, and coming up to _Augustus_, gave him some few Pence, saying, _take this Money_, Cesar, _I give it you, not according to your great Fortune, but according to my poor Ability; had I more, my liberality would be greater_. The whole company fell a laughing, and the Emperour more than the rest, who ordered him a hundred thousand Crowns.